the power of your voice

Isn’t this crazy, if we don’t say or post something several times a day, an algorithm decides we are not good enough to listen to and marks us as unimportant. Basically, we get dropped to the bottom of “influence” and are not allowed to play but sit on the bench and watch the game.

No wonder that our society feels overwhelmed and anxious. Stuck with the feeling of not good enough and unworthiness as we drain in information overflow. Information that most often is full of empty words and empty of full expression. Stories that don’t matter.

It’s interesting, I see people speaking who have many opinions but that don’t serve a purpose or add any real value. And people that keep quiet who should really speak up for themselves and others.

I see nowadays, a normal conversation is almost impossible as people attack each other’s perspectives without asking questions and the ability of constructive criticism.

I see people turn other people’s word in their own mouth and use it against them. To attack.

I see so much anger and rage. Denial and shame.

It seems a proverbial war out there. The only difference: we don’t cut heads with swords anymore. We cut heads with hurtful words.

Tell me, is that a world in which you would like to live in?

I wonder how we can overcome this?

I wonder what do we humans need to come closer, to heal our emotional and mental wounds, and let our heart wall down?

Tell me, what do you need?

Is it an outside approval or how can you give this sense of security, the love and certainty to yourself?

One of the great problems: how to communicate clearly with others.

Humans talk too much, or not at all. We either express too much or too little of ourselves - or at the wrong timing!

This might be an uncomfortable truth to swallow - most people speak only to gain approval or recognition. They are not really interested in the other. Means they usually speak out of selfish reasons. They want something. They even lie, manipulate or withhold the truth. Some do it on purpose, others aren’t aware of their underlying patterns and unhealed wounds.

If people are too expressive and cannot stop talking, they might say the right things but at the wrong time or to the wrong audience. They are desperately trying to be heard because they cannot hear themselves clearly. As a result, they might get pushed away by others which makes them feel hurt or angry of not being understood.

The urge to express oneself and the pressure to be heard and seen coupled with the inability to hear yourself or others creates a lethal cocktail.

People who speak the loudest rarely have the best ideas (Susan Cain)  

Understand the power of words in a world that can’t stop talking.

Most people misuse their voices. We are made believe: if you are not loud, you are no one. If you are not seen and heard, you do not exist.  

Yes, we misuse the power of our voices in so many instances. And yet... only believe the word of someone in authority without questioning the content, truth and validity to make up our own opinion.

What we focus on becomes our future. What we stand up for or bow down to becomes our future.

What topics have your attention?

What media has your attention? 

What do you give your voice to?

People made believe they are under control of authorities, such as governments and the media.

What you don’t realize: You have so much more control of it than you think.

You are not only in control of it. You are dictating it.

Tell me, what are you deeming important and give your attention to?

Not the media controls us. It’s us people who is in control of the media. It is a conscious choice where to put your attention to. In return, what you see broadcasted through the media is a mere reflection what you, we as society are interested in.

You are interested in horror movies, war, death, and sickness and all the bad news? Well, that’s what you get by constantly clicking and consuming it. Change your desire on what kind of content you like to read, watch and listen to and the media will change.

Every time you click on an add, a link, a post and video you are voting. You are voting with your voice. You see? Your voice has enormously power, but we all were made believe we don’t. Each vote you cast is like a “spell” and adds up to what is important to humanity. (that’s where the word “spelling” is originated from)

From this day forward keep in mind what you are voting for.

That doesn’t mean we should keep our eyes closed off the cruelties and injustices in this world. A good ratio to follow:

• put 20% of your time and attention on what is not working in your personal life and globally

• put 80% of your time, energy and attention what is working and to build a world you and your kids like to live in

When something catches your attention ask yourself: why is this important to me? Every time you watch something, every time you click on something it is an invitation for the media to show you more of it. Think about it carefully: how do you think a better world can look like 2, 20, 200 years from now?

The other extreme

And then there are introverts’ who often do not understand the need to verbalize their inner world all the time. And people who are choked by fear of rejection and self-doubt, so much that they believe they cannot speak up and say what they think, feel or need. They fear the consequences, eventually be punished, exposed, or being shamed. Hence, they keep silent or are in denial focused on superficial topics in conversations.

Our society kept in silence is often a result of oppression, domination and authoritarianism. Again, we might want to deny it, yet it is right in front of our eyes. Happening to us right now.

Sometimes, speaking too much, at the wrong time or not at all is like a razor's edge. Although it’s no one’s “fault”, it is our individual responsibility to change it. It takes awareness, willingness to reframe the pattern, courage, and a little practice.

If we do not have self-awareness and can hear what’s going on inside ourselves, we

·  won’t be able to hear, understand and relate to others

·  create misunderstandings & intolerance

·  fear to be excluded by others

·  build our heart wall to not let others in by thinking we are right and know everything better

·  think someone can look into our head and understands what’s going on there (unfortunately transmission of thought is not a common practice yet)

·  talk at instead of with someone which makes others feel small, uncomfortable and creates discord

The secret to use the power of your voice

Humans are the cause to its own suffering and it’s time to get out of the loop of unconsciousness – unless you enjoy suffering in your own suffering. In that case, ignore this article and keep doing whatever you do.

For everyone else - It’s never too late to learn how to communicate.

Look at it that way: Everything is frequency.

Life and relationships are about tuning ourselves. What is your frequency?

I bet you agree, there is nothing more painful than to hear a musician whose instrument is out of tune.

Imagine you are that instrument. Which one would you be? A guitar, cello, piano, flute, a harp maybe? How does it sound when it is fine-tuned? And what happens if it is distorted, out of tune? Does it hurt in your ear or make you flinch?

You see, language is frequency. It’s not only the words we say but HOW.

The gift of communication does not lie in the speaker’s language skills. Its far more subtle – it lies in the heart. You will just understand someone who is speaking from the purity of his heart. Regardless the words they use. It’s vibration. A certain cadence. 

If you are not in harmony and balance but carry loads of guilt, disappointment and bitterness inside you, much you say and do will come from a place of pain, neediness, greed or scarcity.

Even the most beautiful words sound ugly, are dangerous and create division and disease when spoken though the frequency of fear, frustration, or anger.

Much of we can witness through our outer authorities, as the media.

The secret sauce is self-awareness.

Ask yourself more often:

What is the story I am telling myself and others?

Is it corrupted or coming from the heart?

When it is corrupted when did it happen?

Where does it come from?

Why do I want to say this right now?

Does it add value to someone or am I trying to be heard and need attention?

What makes me believe if I speak up that I’ll get punished, hurt or rejected?

How can I speak my truth without intentionally cut someone off?

Do I speak from my head voice or heart voice?

Care. Attune your frequency. There is power in your voice. Use it. Speak your truth.